14 pages of brilliant jokes, thought provoking too... →
You'll never see a church with free Wi-Fi.
I guess it’s because they don’t want to compete with an invisible power that actually works.
Why do you put a baby in a blender head first
So you can look into its eyes as you masturbate.
Apparently, if you eat Oreo's you're supporting...
Reblog if you’d like 3 messages from a curious...
Wrote a letter to my MP
On House of Lords reform and how bishops shouldn’t be granted a seat. The full letter is on the read more. [[MORE]] Dear Mr Selous, I wish to appeal to you in relation to a campaign currently being run by the British Humanist association which states that: ”We want fair reform of the House of Lords which does not afford privilege to any special interest group. We urge the Government...
If you have a right to be offended
Then I have a right to offend you , you can’t have one without the other. So get over it, if you’re offended by something I say chances are I don’t really care because I’ve said what I think is right, or funny in the case of offensive jokes.
Got a new favourite insult: Eat Shit
Just updated the Old CV
I’ve done shit loads in the two years since I did it last time.
Virgin media want to charge me £50
for an “engineer” to come an install my broadband. And by install I mean spend about 15 minutes plugging a little black box in. What the actual fuck , when did society decide it was acceptable to be paying someone £50 for 15 minutes work (£200 per hour) that a fucking chimp could do. And to call them engineers is offensive at best given I’m having do a 4 year degree , paying...
Be very sceptical of anyone who claims that:
“Omg I go so hyper after eating/drinking …” “I was buzzing from a sugar rush” It’s bollocks, there is zero link between sugar, colourings , additives and hyperactivity. Essentially parents expect their kids to get hyper from Coke for example so they see hyper kids. Experiments have been done where all the sample were given fizzy drinks , but half of the...
Jimmy Carr has been putting his money through a...
Which I have to say from the start is 100% legal (or at least was when Carr was using it , the HMRC are investigating it now) It’s estimated that by using Jimmy Carr was probably only paying 1% tax as opposed to the 50% he would if he didn’t use it. Politicians have all widely condemned his use of this scheme however let’s take a minute here: It’s legal Since when have...